He Is Worth It All
EuropeWhen I was around 6 years old, I sat in a small country church listening to a missionary pray a prayer that forever changed my life. He prayed that God would call someone into missions, and in the quiet moment that followed I heard a voice whisper – I want you. It was probably the first time I heard God speak, and I remember saying – No! I instantly began to compare myself with everyone in the room and thought that God was making a mistake. But I felt like the Christian thing to do was to follow my no with – If you want me, you’re going to have to be the one to get me there. I packed that moment away and lived my life without really giving it a second thought.
I was seventeen, scared, a bit broken inside, and wondering how my life was going to turn out. I was in an unhealthy relationship, and my relationship with God was more like me telling God my plans and hoping he would do his part in making my dreams come true. Then God began to speak to me. Elina, you can keep on living this life the way you are living it, and you may be happy, but you will never go where I want you to go, never do what I want you to do and never be who I have created you to be. What a moment. God didn’t put my happiness on the line; he reminded me of something much deeper – my purpose.
So many things happened after that moment to get me to where I am today. I live in Leipzig, Germany with my husband, Tyler. God miraculously changed his life and called him into missions. He brought us together, and he began to form us for his purpose here in Germany. We’ve planted two churches and hope to plant more. My heart is to see people not just accept Jesus as Lord but be transformed and live their lives like Jesus lived his – all in!
What I’ve learned through this process is that we have to lose ourselves in order to actually find who we are in Christ and what our purpose and deepest desires really are. I tried living my life my own way, and it was broken and unfulfilling. I gave my life to Jesus, and my life has still had its mountain-sized challenges, but the difference is knowing that I am fulfilling my purpose and walking through this life hand in hand with the one who knows all my steps. When life and ministry is hard, I know it’s also worth it, and there is nothing else in this world that could ever fulfill me like Jesus does. He is worth it all.